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by Andrew Hodges posted Aug 25 2015 9:45AM

Joey Fatone To One Direction: “Everything Is About To Be Terrible”

Former NSYNC-er Joey Fatone posted a message to One Direction, now that the British boy band announced its 'hiaitus'

"Dear Liam Payne, Louis Tomlinson, Niall Horan and Harry Styles,

"Hey guys. It's Joey Fatone, former member of NSync and current announcer on Family Feud, the job I've always dreamed of. This weekend, while sitting on the toilet and crying (I LOVE MY LIFE!!!) I flipped through my iPhone and saw that you'd announced a "one-year hiatus" beginning in March. I just wanted to congratulate you guys and wish you well! I'm sure 2016 will be a wonderful time for everyone from One Direction to pursue some independent projects before regrouping as a stronger band one year later! Here's to spreading your wings!


"Here's how it's gonna go down, fellas. While you're all on hiatus, Harry will record some dope singles with Beyonce, Ryan Adams and Wiz Khalifa, come out with a killer solo album produced by Pharrell and Timbaland, cut his hair, dye his hair, do a second less awesome album, let his hair grow super long and wear it in two braids, crush a self-effacing cameo in a Judd Apatow movie, buzz his hair and release a third, self-produced album on which he hints at being bisexual that everyone will call his "best work."

"The rest of you are fu--ed. I mean fucked. I am the second most-successful former member of NSync and I am Joey Fatone. Say that outloud to yourself: "Besides Justin Timberlake, Joey Fatone is the most successful member of NSync."

"Here's me being a spokesman for Bosley hair restoration last year:

"Best case scenario, you'll do a 6-week stint in Minions: The Musical! on Broadway before you bounce around different hosting jobs on channels like Spike and TruTv. Do you know what Chris Kirkpatrick is doing? Because I don't. He's completely unreachable. He might be managing a Best Buy in Sacramento, he might be dead. No one knows. Louis, I'm looking at you.

"There is one exception: If one of you is gay you might have a shot. Wait till One Direction has been dead for two years, kiss your hot boyfriend at an awards show, then ride that relevance like a beautiful boner and pray to god you get a show on Bravo.

"It's not that you guys aren't talented, it's that Harry is so, so much cuter, cooler and more talented than the rest of you. Deep down, you've always known that, but you will never truly understand it until you're in your grimy little condo, sitting in your boxers, sucking a chow mein noodle off your Playstation controller and watching Harry blow it up on SNL.

"Jesus christ I wish I was still in NSync. Jesus…JESUS F--! I would give all my hair to go back to that.

"Anyway, enjoy the next few months, One Direction, because they're your last.

by Andrew Hodges posted Aug 12 2015 12:10PM
As a Mom of three I know how stressful packing something some what tasty for your kids can be!! Like for real I sometimes lose sleep over this ish. Thank the good lord above I came across this list of some really cool ideas of what to pack the little picky eaters. So here you are my friends...

A month of kid-approved school lunches

A month of school lunch ideas!

In the order of the pictures above:

  1. Mini ham & cheese sub sandwich served with sweet potato Pop Chips, carrots & baby dill pickles, and no sugar added natural apple sauce.
  2. Ham & cheese tortilla roll-up (deli ham & cream cheese rolled up on a whole wheat tortilla), with black olives, grape tomatoes, Fig Newtons, and some Cheetos.
  3. "Nacho Bar" – corn chips, plain greek yogurt (or you could use sour cream), black olives, grape tomatoes, and cubed cheddar cheese.
  4. "Breakfast for lunch" – bagel & cream cheese, with a cup of nuts & yogurt raisins, and some yogurt.
  5. Dino-mite lunch (click here for full details)
  6. "Homemade lunchable" – sliced cheddar, ham cut in squares, Wheat Thins, grape tomatoes, no sugar added natural apple sauce, and a Fig Newton
  7. PB&J bites (make a sandwich and use small cookie cutters to cut out fun shapes) with baby dill pickles, tomatoes, black olives, cheetos, and a Fig Newton.
  8. Star Wars themed lunch (his first day of school request). Full details & free printable lunch notes in this post —> Star Wars lunch
  9. Turbo Snail themed lunch (click here for full details).

For more fun and really cool ideas (that I more than likely won't try because I'm too lazy) just click here for the full blog that I did not do lol.

Good Luck on the first day of school and happy packing!!!!
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